Tag Archives: depressed

Confronted

Drowning myself in everything near and far

To occupy my thoughts from straying too far

 

Not completely understanding why

I mean I was completely fine, wasn’t I?

 

The rug was pulled and it became evident

The mess underneath was beyond the expectant

 

Nowhere to run, nowhere to hide

The whirlwind of emotions, let rip inside

 

The will to fight was long gone

With a sigh I was done.

I see you there, do you see me?

I see you there,  looking at me or through me?

I see you there, ignoring me or listening to me?

The worry in your eyes, you seem so detached

No one else notices, oblivious to the facts

Sitting there, with your guard up and a smile on

Sitting there, acting brave and strong

For the ordinary observer not one who cares

You are fine, not scared

Don’t you know I don’t care

Whether your perfect or full of flaws

One random thing

You know what I love? How randomly one little thing that happens to you can make you feel so good! I mean you read it, you see it, you hear it or anything and at that moment you feel great! Something totally random. Something that to others is probably not that big of a deal just totally lights up your world and suddenly the world seems right. =D

Ok so now you’re probably wondering…..huh? What the heck has her so worked up?

It was actually a blog about this girl(confessionsofasmalltownslacker) (Yeah I know even her name is awesome) who seems so much like me that it felt great to read through each and every one of her posts. Yeah it sounds stalkerish but what the hay =P Everything sounded like something I could write. Reading it made me feel less weird….so yeah that was the reason for the awesome mood at the moment.

Other times awesome moods hit me…….once I felt terrible and I locked myself in my room. After like half an hour of crying (I can’t remember why) I heard the sound of little kittens meowing outside the window. The sound of the kittens made me feel better instantly…..I was really grateful.

Hmm mm other times, other times…..my friends are good sweet talkers. So sometimes they help out. Other times its a random quote I happen to come across or a song with nice lyrics. Even the fact that someone notices I’m upset and takes the trouble to ask makes me feel better because I’m not good at expressing myself so most people don’t even realize when I’m upset. You can see how that’s depressing in its own way when no one even notices…. but yeah then that’s the point. Its the little things that sometimes get us through the bad stuff. And when someone actually helps you get through a tough spot you tend to remember it and be forever indebted to that person. So anytime you see someone upset even though you might not know what to say, most of the time even listening helps.

Ok I got off track there, the post was supposed to be light hearted…..anyway! I just want to say…….Enjoy the little things!

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